With only some exceptions, most people who have children in the U.S. don’t expect to raise them alone. Unfortunately, life happens. Couples separate, spouses get divorced, or maybe you even have to deal with the loss of your partner.
Whatever the case, over 13 million single parents are raising over 21 million kids in this country. Doing it on your own can be incredibly rewarding, but it comes with plenty of challenges. There might be times when you think you’re not ready to handle it, or you might get completely overwhelmed.
Thankfully, there are resources available that can help you as a single parent and tips that can guide you through life’s big events as well as everyday routines. Let’s take a look at some of those resources, skills, and how you can put them to use.
Making the Most of Big Moments
Everyone experiences big life changes from time to time. They can include things like:
Divorce/separation
New job
Medical conditions
Loss of a loved one
New school
One of the biggest life changes you can go through as a family, however, is moving. As a single parent, you might find yourself having to move to a more economical home. Or, if you’ve taken on a new job, it could require you to change locations.
That can be a daunting task for you and your kids, but it’s not impossible. There are lots of tips for single parents looking for a home. Your biggest concern in home-buying is likely what you can afford. Figure out what you need before you start looking, create a budget, and don’t be afraid to ask for help. That can come in the form of family members and friends. Or, you can look into first-time homebuyer programs that can provide different types of financial assistance. As long as you’re not looking for properties completely out of reach, help is available and can make moving an easier transition for everyone.
Revamping Your Routine
Some of the biggest challenges you’ll face as a single parent will come from everyday situations. Maybe your child suddenly “doesn’t like” spaghetti even though they did last week. Maybe your teenager is dealing with relationship drama and locking themselves in their room. The everyday stresses can take a toll, but you can combat them by leaning on your support system and taking advantage of resources that can help.
One “everyday problem” that can seem like a big deal at the time is your child starting school for the first time. For little ones, that can be a scary step. But, you can make it easier on them by working with them every day on their social and emotional skills and gross motor skills. You can even integrate learning into their everyday routine. That child who doesn’t like spaghetti? Get them in the kitchen with you to measure out ingredients, and you’ll be teaching them math and science while making something delicious.
The small moments in your daily routine with your kids might offer big challenges, but they can also make the biggest differences in their lives.
Taking Care of Yourself
Self-care can often feel like a buzzword these days. But, for a single parent, it’s an incredibly important practice for your physical and mental well-being. Self-care doesn’t have to be anything luxurious, expensive, or time-consuming. Try things like:
Meditation
Mindfulness
Gratitude journaling
Cooking your favorite meal
Exercising
Enjoying a hot bath
It’s also important to find time for yourself to do something you really enjoy or want. If you miss the companionship of being in a relationship, don’t be afraid to start dating again, or putting yourself out there to have more of a social life.
If you don’t have anyone to watch your kids, consider some home dates. It’s a great way to introduce a potential partner to your children and get your kids comfortable with the idea of someone being around. Have a game night, cook dinner together, or simply watch a movie. When you’re parenting on your own, having that time to focus on yourself – even for a little while – can make a world of difference.
Keep these ideas in mind the next time you feel overwhelmed by a big life change, or even a small, everyday problem. It’s important to remember that you’re not alone, help is available, and one day you’ll look back and realize how strong you were to overcome the challenges of single parenting – and how fulfilling the experience was.
