Parenting is hard enough. But, when you have crazy kids, it can take the challenge to a whole other level. You need to find things to control the kids, while still showing them love. Here are three strategies that you might consider when faced with this dilemma.
Redirection
When your child, or children, are going crazy, it might be useful to redirect their behavior. If they are involved in a high energy activity, you might want to consider changing the activity to something that requires a different kind of energy and more creativity. So, if they are playing a game outside and seem to be a little bit too excited when they come back inside, you could have them do a craft or make cookies. This kind of activity will require more focus and concentration. Hopefully, this will dispel some of the over excitement and get them ready for quiet time, dinner, bedtime, and more.
Join In
If your kids are running around the house and absolutely driving you crazy, stop and consider if they’re just kids being silly or if you’re being a little too harsh and quick to judge. It may be that you have fallen too far from fun! Join in on the activity. This will help you bond with your kids and create lasting memories and moments with your little ones. The laundry can wait. The vacuum will still be there tomorrow. However, your kids won’t be small and silly and full of lighthearted fun forever.
Patience
Sometimes a child needs to be given the opportunity to get out emotions. This might appear that the child is acting in a crazy manner. However, having patience and carefully monitoring the situation might give you insight into the cause of the behavior and ways that could be useful in correcting it. Sometimes, parents jump-the-gun and act to control the behavior before they fully understand it. This is where patience comes into play. It might be difficult to do at first, but it is a method that should be used when appropriate. You do not want your child acting out for too long, especially since it might be accompanied by destructive behavior. When it’s safe for your child to do what they feel, patiently listen and observe to better understand their core motivation.
Empathy
Let your child know that their behavior is inappropriate but that you want to understand what is going on. You do not have to accept their behavior, but you want to empathize with them, so they learn how to manage themselves better. They need to separate the behavior from their feelings. Having discussions during this kind of period can create a teaching moment. It will give you the time to let your child know what appropriate behavior is and why what they are doing is wrong and unacceptable.
Teaching Moments
When your children misbehave or engage in destructive behavior, try turning it into a teaching moments instead of yelling at them or going straight to a punishment. For example, if your children are outside playing baseball and end up breaking a car window, take a deep breath and wait. Do they try to hide their “crime” or do they come to you and apologize? Sit them down and listen to their side of the story. Find out exactly what happened and explain to them the consequences of their decision to report what happened or to try to cover it up. Involve them in the aftermath. Have them (safely) help clean up the glass. Take them with you to the windshield replacement business to get your vehicle repaired. Explain throughout the process how forgiveness and understanding has helped you. Share how their actions have made you feel. Have your child do chores to help “pay off” the cost of the damage. This one situation could turn into a long term lesson as well as many smaller lessons along the way.
These are not the only methods and it might (and probably will) be necessary to use more than one method to get control of a crazy, silly, amazing child. But, try not to stress. Embrace the journey and know that there are plenty of other parents trying to figure out the same thing. You’re not alone! The most important part of any method is the love, understanding, and patience you show toward your little kiddos.